147,077 Fans   4,312 Followers  

The Proverbs 31 Woman – Week 11

This week we are looking at Proverbs 31:28-29

28 Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
29 “Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all.”

A reader emailed me and asked the question:

How can I be a Proverbs 31 woman with a husband who has an alcohol problem and can’t hold a steady job?”

Here are my thoughts on this:

(if you are reading this in an email or feed - click here to view the video)

The Proverbs 31 woman knew her husband’s needs, met them and as a result he praised her. If we neglect what our husbands ask for, ignore their advice, withold love in the bedroom *wink*, refuse to respect them – it’s inevitable – we will not get a whole lot of praise from our husbands.

We can be the best room mother, best career woman, best servant at church, or best friend another woman can have but when we come home – if our husband’s needs are not met – we have failed to be like the Proverbs 31 woman.
{excerpt from the ebook}

Now let’s reverse the above scenario – let’s imagine that you do respect your husband and do all of the above…and he does not praise you…this is a very real scenario for many many wives. I stood in the hallway at the Proverbs 31 conference while a woman told me the story of how she loved her husband and always sought to please him…and he was cheating on her. This was not her issue – this was his! It was not her fault that he walked away – it was his.

Proverbs is a book of principles NOT promises. The principle stands that a woman who strives to be noble – will have a husband who at the end of her days praises her. But this is not a promise…and for some – their husband’s will never be the Proverbs 31 husband – and it is HIM who is falling short of what God has called him to be in Proverbs 31 and in Ephesians 5.

We cannot change our husbands or be their Holy Spirit. We must simply pray for them and walk in obedience to God’s word.

This week’s challenge: Go to your husband and children and ask them…what is it that I do or say that makes you feel loved? Find out what is most important to them…is it a backrub, a homemade meal, tossing a football in the back yard, gifts, words of affirmation, or something else? Write it down somewhere so you never forget what makes each individual in your family most feel loved and be sure to do whatever that thing is as often as you can this week.

Walk with the King,

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...
Twitter Facebook Pinterest


  1. Amen! I am going to work on this wholeheartedly!

  2. Wow…scary challenge this week, but I will try!

  3. I love this today. “A principal, not a promise!” I needed this great reminder. So true and as long as Jesus is honored in our lives…. everything is okay.

    Thank You Courtney and this really ministered to me today.

  4. Thank you for touching on this issue. I have known so many women who have done what they are supposed to do and their husbands, even ones who say they are Christians, feel it is well within their rights to live however they want and treat their wives poorly. Too many times these verses are thrown in those women’s faces to “prove” to them they really aren’t living right because if they were their husband would necessarily do what he is supposed to do.

  5. I like this, I definitely try this.

  6. Crystal says:

    It’s really inspired to me! It’s a principal, not a promise! I will keep on doing good and right even don’t get right treated. I do it for Jesus and he is fountain of love and joy and peace!

  7. Thank you so much, Courtney for sharing your wisdom with us today!!! I agree with many of the above comments….love how you mentioned that the Proverbs are principals….not promises. :) Great point to make! :)

    Love God Greatly!

  8. I wrote a post earlier this year entitled, “When hubby doesn’t ‘deserve’ a Proverbs 31 wife.” Basically, I believe that the ONLY way in life to be fully content and fulfilled is to be living fully in God’s will. So, the way I treat my husband has nothing to do with what he deserves, and everything to do with ME and what God has called me to do, regardless of outside circumstances.

Speak Your Mind


Hide me
Sign up below to receive free study materials!
Enter your email address:
Show me